from Canto II

201

Some take a lover, some take drams or prayers,
     Some mind their household, others dissipation,
Some run away, and but exchange their cares,
     Losing the advantage of a virtuous station;
Few changes e’er can better their affairs,
     Theirs being an unnatural situation,
From the dull palace to the dirty hovel:
Some play the devil, and then write a novel.

202

Haide was Nature’s bride, and knew not this;
     Haide was Passion’s child, born where the sun
Showers triple light, and scorches even the kiss
     Of his gazelle-eyed daughters; she was one
Made but to love, to feel that she was his
     Who was her chosen: what was said or done
Elsewhere was nothing—She had nought to fear,
Hope, care, nor love beyond, her heart beat here.

203

And oh! that quickening of the heart, that beat!
     How much it costs us! yet each rising throb
Is in its cause as its effect so sweet,
     That Wisdom, ever on the watch to rob
Joy of its alchymy, and to repeat
     Fine truths; even Conscience, too, has a tough job
To make us understand each good old maxim,
So good—I wonder Castlereagh don’t tax ‘em.

204

And now ‘twas done—on the lone shore were plighted
     Their hearts; the stars, their nuptial torches, shed
Beauty upon the beautiful they lighted:
     Ocean their witness, and the cave their bed,
By their own feelings hallow’d and united,
     Their priest was Solitude, and they were wed:
And they were happy, for to their young eyes
Each was an angel, and earth paradise.

205

Oh Love! of whom great Caesar was the suitor,
     Titus the master, Antony the slave,
Horace, Catullus, scholars, Ovid tutor,
    Sappho the sage blue-stocking, in whose grave
All those may leap who rather would be neuter—
     (Leucadia’s rock still overlooks the wave)
Oh Love! thou art the very god of evil,
For, after all, we cannot call thee devil.

206

Thou mak’st the chaste connubial state precarious,
    And jestest with the brows of mightiest men:
Caesar and Pompey, Mahomet, Belisarius,
     Have much employ’d the muse of history’s pen;
Their lives and fortunes were extremely various,
     Such worthies Time will never see again;
Yet to these four in three things the same luck holds,
They all were heroes, conquerors, and cuckolds.

207

Thou mak’st philosophers; there’s Epicurus
    And Aristippus, a material crew!
Who to immoral courses would allure us
     By theories quite practicable too;
If only from the devil they would insure us,
     How pleasant were the maxim, (not quite new)
“Eat, drink, and love, what can the rest avail us?”
So said the royal sage Sardanapalus.

208

But Juan! had he quite forgotten Julia?
     And should he have forgotten her so soon?
I can’t but say it seems to me most truly a
     Perplexing question; but, no doubt, the moon
Does these things for us, and whenever newly a
     Strong palpitation rises, ‘tis her boon,
Else how the devil is it that fresh features
Have such a charm for us poor human creatures?

209

I hate inconstancy—I loathe, detest,
    Abhor, condemn, abjure the mortal made
Of such quicksilver clay that in his breast
     No permanent foundation can be laid;
Love, constant love, has been my constant guest,
     And yet last night, being at a masquerade,
I saw the prettiest creature, fresh from Milan,
Which gave me some sensations like a villain.

210

But soon Philosophy came to my aid,
     And whisper’d “think of every sacred tie!”
“I will, my dear Philosophy!” I said,
     “But then her teeth, and then, Oh heaven! her eye!
I’ll just inquire if she be wife or maid,
     Or neither—out of curiosity.”
“Stop!” cried Philosophy, with air so Grecian,
(Though she was masqued then as a fair Venetian).