from Canto V

71

“For his own share—he saw but small objection
     To so respectable an ancient rite;
And, after swallowing down a slight refection,
     For which he owned a present appetite,
He doubted not a few hours of reflection
     Would reconcile him to the business quite.”
“Will it?” said Juan, sharply; “Strike me dead
But they as soon shall circumcise my head!

72

“Cut off a thousand heads, before—”—”Now, pray,”
     Replied the other, “do not interrupt:
You put me out in what I had to say.
    Sir!—as I said, as soon as I have supt,
I shall perpend if your proposal may
     Be such as I can properly accept;
Provided always your great goodness still
Remits the matter to our own free-will.”

73

Baba eyed Juan, and said, “Be so good
     As dress yourself—” and pointed out a suit
In which a Princess with great pleasure would
     Array her limbs; but Juan standing mute,
As not being in a masquerading mood,
     Gave it a slight kick with his christian foot;
And when the old negro told him to “Get ready,”
Replied, “Old gentleman, I’m not a lady.”

74

“What you may be, I neither know nor care,”
     Said Baba; “but pray do as I desire:
I have no more time nor many words to spare.”
     “At least,” said Juan, “sure I may inquire
The cause of this odd travesty?”—”Forbear,”
     Said Baba, “to be curious; ‘twill transpire,
No doubt, in proper place, and time, and season:
I have no authority to tell the reason.”

75

“Then if I do,” said Juan, “I’ll be—” “Hold!”
     Rejoined the Negro, “pray be not provoking;
This spirit’s well, but it may wax too bold,
     And you will find us not too fond of joking.”
“What, sir,” said Juan, “shall it e’er be told
    That I unsexed my dress?” But Baba stroking
The things down, said—”Incense me, and I call
Those who will leave you of no sex at all.

76

“I offer you a handsome suit of clothes:
     A woman’s, true; but then there is a cause
Why you should wear them.”—”What, though my soul loathes
     The effeminate garb?”—thus, after a short pause,
Sighed Juan, muttering also some slight oaths,
     “What the devil shall I do with all this gauze?”
Thus he profanely termed the finest lace
Which e’er set off a marriage-morning face.

77

And then he swore; and, sighing, on he slipped
    A pair of trowsers of flesh-coloured silk,
Next with a virgin zone he was equipped,
     Which girt a slight chemise as white as milk;
But tugging on his petticoat he tripped,
    Which—as we say—or as the Scotch say whilk,
(The rhyme obliges me to this; sometimes
Monarchs are less imperative than rhymes)—

78

Whilk, which (or what you please), was owing to
     His garment’s novelty, and his being awkward;
And yet at last he managed to get through
     His toilet, though no doubt a little backward:
The negro Baba helped a little too,
    When some untoward part of raiment stuck hard;
And, wrestling both his arms into a gown,
He paused and took a survey up and down.

79

One difficulty still remained,—his hair
     Was hardly long enough; but Baba found
So many false long tresses all to spare,
     That soon his head was most completely crowned,
After the manner then in fashion there;
     And this addition with such gems was bound
As suited the ensemble of his toilet,
While Baba made him comb his head and oil it.

80

And now being femininely all arrayed,
     With some small aid from scissors, paint, and tweezers,
He looked in almost all respects a maid,
    And Baba smilingly exclaimed, “You see, sirs,
A perfect transformation here displayed;
    And now, then, you must come along with me, sirs,
That is—the Lady”: clapping his hands twice,
Four blacks were at his elbow in a trice.